I was fortunate enough this spring break to experience life in the Old World. Well, not so much experiencing life but at least seeing it. My flight (that I shared with darling little infant Satans) brought me to Land of Tea and Crumpets and Nation of Stuck-up Waiters who get Their Asses Kicked by Nazis in Half an Hour. Both these places were quite interesting to observe, more interesting to converse with their people, and the most interesting to converse with these people when they have had too many beers. The cities were crammed full of old architecture, artwork, and culture and still managed to acquire a modern lifestyle. There was such a beautiful difference from the United States.
Yet there was one particular detail that smacked me right in the blooming face and I didn't like it one bit; where were all the fat kids?! There was a moment when I almost broke down in a panic attack when I boarded a subway car full of uniformed schoolchildren who weren't eating a single candy bar or Big Mac amongst themselves. I had to avert my eyes, as I surely would have expelled my morning feast of bacon and beans onto their properly fitted forms. When I had regained myself I went through all the possible reasons as to how such a horrific pandemic had swept this once great empire.
The fist thing that came to mind was that the country just didn't have enough food to feed its people. It made perfect sense; I mean it does seem to have a much larger population that it can possibly farm for. Every restaurant I had been to always served portions that never quite filled you up but never left you feeling hungry. I'm sure it must be worse for those common citizens who could not afford to eat in restaurants for every meal. It was obvious they did do a bit more walking than the common American child due to their efficient public transportation system that hindered the creation of a soccer (or shall I say football) mom class. But this minor physical assertion of walking should find an easy fattening solution from the holier than God chocolate that they have in every convenience store on every street. I doubt I will ever be able to eat another pathetic excuse that Hershey's calls chocolate here in the States. Cookies n' Crème? Try Cookies n' Crap! That brown gold they have over there would blow away the cocaine market if it ever decided to cross the Atlantic. But I digress.
What I am trying to call to attention is that these people need our help. They may not be starving like Africa, (we'll get to them some day I'm sure) but they just aren't plump. I felt ashamed and guilty for living in such luxury while I looked at the children of our mother country and their absence of double chins. As I boarded the train to take me away from this place I stopped by a vending machine chock full of scrumptious treats and bought one. I was about to give it to the poor blissfully ignorant child to my right but when I saw his crooked tooth smile, I knew that candy bar would do no good in fattening him, and I solemnly took a bite.
Yet there was one particular detail that smacked me right in the blooming face and I didn't like it one bit; where were all the fat kids?! There was a moment when I almost broke down in a panic attack when I boarded a subway car full of uniformed schoolchildren who weren't eating a single candy bar or Big Mac amongst themselves. I had to avert my eyes, as I surely would have expelled my morning feast of bacon and beans onto their properly fitted forms. When I had regained myself I went through all the possible reasons as to how such a horrific pandemic had swept this once great empire.
The fist thing that came to mind was that the country just didn't have enough food to feed its people. It made perfect sense; I mean it does seem to have a much larger population that it can possibly farm for. Every restaurant I had been to always served portions that never quite filled you up but never left you feeling hungry. I'm sure it must be worse for those common citizens who could not afford to eat in restaurants for every meal. It was obvious they did do a bit more walking than the common American child due to their efficient public transportation system that hindered the creation of a soccer (or shall I say football) mom class. But this minor physical assertion of walking should find an easy fattening solution from the holier than God chocolate that they have in every convenience store on every street. I doubt I will ever be able to eat another pathetic excuse that Hershey's calls chocolate here in the States. Cookies n' Crème? Try Cookies n' Crap! That brown gold they have over there would blow away the cocaine market if it ever decided to cross the Atlantic. But I digress.
What I am trying to call to attention is that these people need our help. They may not be starving like Africa, (we'll get to them some day I'm sure) but they just aren't plump. I felt ashamed and guilty for living in such luxury while I looked at the children of our mother country and their absence of double chins. As I boarded the train to take me away from this place I stopped by a vending machine chock full of scrumptious treats and bought one. I was about to give it to the poor blissfully ignorant child to my right but when I saw his crooked tooth smile, I knew that candy bar would do no good in fattening him, and I solemnly took a bite.
